That was close...Fortunately? Unfortunately?
I was just about to place my total trust in someone the other day and as you've read in one of my earlier posts that can take quite a long, long time to do. I was about to have a deep conversation with this person and say all these things from the heart. I waited a day and I'm glad I did. I won't go into detail here but basically what happened is you hear one thing from a person and they do the opposite. This incident brought back memories of how this person has always said they are on my side etc... etc... but when it comes down to it NEVER spoke up on my behalf, backed me or defended me. Please note I have done all the things mentioned for this person. I eventually overlooked this until the next time it happened but this latest incident has brought this forth again. So, it's back to square one. It's similar to those people who say to your face they agree with you 100% etc... but when it comes to speaking up they clam up when you need them. It's not that they don't still agree with you but they just seem to lose their voice when you need them the most. I have this defensive side to me because I was hurt very badly before. I want to continue my friendship but it's just taken a few steps back now. I can drop feeling hurt or angry but my guard will always be up for sometime again.
I don't mean to make this blog a whiny, complaining, "oh woe is me" blog. I'm not looking for sympathy just a place to vent. So from now on it'll be a happy place....until the next person pisses me off. ;-) LOL! Just kidding.
I don't mean to make this blog a whiny, complaining, "oh woe is me" blog. I'm not looking for sympathy just a place to vent. So from now on it'll be a happy place....until the next person pisses me off. ;-) LOL! Just kidding.
posted by Ann at 3:23 p.m.
7 Comments:
The funny this is I am going through the same thing. Someone seems like they want to get to know you, you feel stringed along, and then no reply etc...it is so frusterating! I really can't stand people who are flaky. I think it is my biggest pet peve. It only takes 2 min out of your day to say something on the phone like "Hey was just calling to say hi. I can't really talk right now, but know I am thinking of you." Never in my life have I ever had to "chase" someone to befriend them, date them, hang out...whatever. It is exhausting. Broken promises are pretty intolerable in my book! It takes a lot for me to give out trust too so I think that ok coming from me.
WOW Did I need to vent or what! LOL. I just thought you would appreciate hearing you are not the only one!!
Hi Molly,
Thanks for your comment and please feel free to vent here any time you wish. I'll always listen...er...or is that read what you have to say.
It's so frustrating to know people like this but thankfully it doesn't happen often. The only way I can describe it is by using the office environment as an example. Let's say you bitch and moan about a certain policy. Your boss decides to have a staff meeting to discuss it and if enough say no the policy may change. While you bitch and moan some of your co-workers say "rah rah rah" and rallying behind you and say "we agree strongly with you" etc... However when the meeting happens you say your piece and NO ONE comes through for you to back you or offer their comments. It's like hearing the crickets in the background.
This drives me bananas. When this happens I feel as though I'm totally alone and that's the worse part of this whole thing.
I'm sorry to hear you're also going through a similar situation. Exhausting is a good way of putting it.
A lot of people would say, "well talk to that person". Well...I could do but you know my instincts are telling me they know they are doing this. I also do not have the energy to go through all that shit. I rather bitch and rant about it, then forget it and just keep my guard up. Does that make any sense or am I nuts? LOL.
Ann
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Well all three of us are in the same boat in round about ways it seems! WELCOME TO ANN'S BITCH AND MOAN SESSION, PLEASE SPEAK YOUR PEACE! LOL.
Well I am pretty easy to read and be with. I hate when the planets are out of alignment so to speak. It just is I am in a situation where the other party has promised to call me and they would like to get together but they don't call or return emails. I feel like I have opened up myself (I was not going to do this really but this person encouraged me with a glimer of hope for a better friendship) so I speaking to a brick wall. The emails I get are pretty short and hardly even answer my questions or ask me any of their own in regards to how I am in my little part of the world here. It is to the point where I feel very embarressed! Yet I continue to get emails encouraging my friendship. I just wish others would know that friendships need to be nurtured, even in the very begining stages of them or you may not keep that connection you made in the first place. I wish all my girfriends could live near me...but hey I get free room and board globally so more money to shop with! WOOHO!
I have been in office situations like that before too. Just it was a very very long time ago...THANK GOODNESS!
Hi Ann,
Thank you for your comments
on my blog.I finally got
power after a long 5 days.
The odd thing is,the houses
across the street facing us
have no power,so I feel a bit
guilty,lol.The biggest b*tch
of it all has been the lack
of gas stations opened.I spent
8 hours on Wednesday on line
for gas and 6 hours on Friday
as my brother took my car to
work and I went to gas his up.
FEMA and Jeb Bush we're slow
in getting water and ice once
again but it was the locals
that pulled together initially
for the first couple of days.
One local business we're
supplying free water and ice
and the supermarket had
generators running so they
we're able to supply stuff
as well.The best news was
that a cold front moved in
immediately the night Wilma
left and it has been in the
60's all week.Ok, that was
my vent,I like this place Ann!
Hope all is well and talk to
you soon.Look foward to the
Attic Wednesday!
Molly,
LOL, this space is becoming a bitch and moan session but heck it's all healthy I say! :-)
It must be so frustrating to be in a friendship where promises are made to keep in contact but they are never kept. But you know what. The friendships that are true will keep promises etc... and if the others don't then they weren't meant to be. Keep your chin up girl because I'm sure you have a wonderful circle of close friends and that's all that matters.
Ann
Hey Mike,
Unbelievable about waiting 8 hours for gas. You're a glutton for punishment for going through it again but you're a good brother for doing that. Good Who karma.
I'm so glad you're okay. And please feel free to vent here any time. Take care and talk soon.
Ann
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